The Kluck Index
Hosted by Kluck
You’ve heard of Hot Takes? Welcome to Kluck’s Not Takes! All the news you didn’t know you needed in a tasty 10 item format!
September 24 2021
A Kardashian makes it to SNL, weed is hitting the fairgrounds, we like our life hacks in the kitchen, and you can get gin-infused pickles! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
September 23 2021
Amazon wants to be our drug dealer too, some of us are too comfy pooping at home to ever go back to the office, British people are drunk in almost all their Facebook pics and some of our impromptu conversation[...]
September 22 2021
Britney is back baby! Old bananas may save your life, Cheetos and Doritos Flamin Hot sauces are heading your way and only half of seniors are out there on the interwebz... See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
September 17 2021
Americans have voted on the best driving song of all time, we're getting studio "updates," the Koreas are at it again, food is hella pricey these days and it's a very sacred day for Jason Lee! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy[...]
September 21 2021
People are faking championship rings? School bathrooms are trashed these days, Pennsylvania is cracking down on the good times, the Lions got diced up in Green Bay and hug an IT professional! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
September 20 2021
There may be another Kardashian sex tape floating around, half of us dream about what's on the menu the next day, Popeye's is legit trying to kill you and what age should you feel like an adult? See omnystudio.com/listener for[...]
September 16 2021
Britney Spears broke our hearts this week, a Napa winery has maybe the best worst idea for a wine bottle ever, a third of Texas is fat AF, and the new Roomba avoids dog poop. Carry on! See omnystudio.com/listener for[...]
September 15 2021
Baskin Robbins is bringing back a classic, Putin may have COVID, Taco Bell is testing a Taco Pass...and something was wrong with Jason's mic so excuse the garbage audio... See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
September 14 2021
Scientists have found binge watching may ACTUALLY shrink your brain, college kids ain't what they used to be, there is a peak age for having fun (spoiler: you passed it) and there are two different types of sweat! See omnystudio.com/listener[...]
September 13 2021
Panera is testing a chicken sandwich that will need a stick of gum chaser, squirrels have personalities, face lifts for men are a thing and all the hilarity from the NFL week 1! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
September 10 2021
We refuse to throw away plastic, the inventor of the Happy Meal has passed on, it costs too much to not be a pig and it's National TV Dinner day! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
September 9 2021
Half of renters have the same worry, Mercedes has maybe the smartest car of all, Honey Baked Ham wants into your wallet and you can buy a very pricey murder car! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
September 8 2021
We waste LOADS of time scrolling through Netflix looking for something to watch, we're all gonna be losing money on the NFL this year, we lost a Tiger King, and we have a new variant!! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
September 7 2021
Back after an extended weekend! TB12 got the COVID, we all have string opinions about drinking water, Machine Gun Kelly gets physical and men are giving up the online porno. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
September 2 2021
You can't yell a certain work at PGA events anymore, half of teachers are thinking about hanging it up, half of KISS is out, the CDC would like a word about your Labor Day plans and a new (maybe good?)[...]
September 1 2021
David Allen Coe? More like David Allan COVID, am I right? McD's may be shutting down all their dining rooms, Jake Paul is done boxing and China is grounding like ALL their kids. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 31 2021
Oh Lord, where did August go? We have a new COVID variant, Wendy's wants you dead, CVS is getting into the shrink business and Flamin' Hot Mt. Dew goes on sale today!! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 30 2021
Sonic wants to keep you refreshed and out of jail, most of us still divide chores based on gender, Spotify has crowned it's newest champ and TikTok has had enough of our clowning around. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 27 2021
Charges continue to pile up against Ron Jeremy, billionaires made out well during the pandemic, some of us need a digital detox and R. Kelly has some serious money issues..... See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 26 2021
Dog the Bounty Hunter kind of looks like one of those guys, we throw out a ton of food, the beetus is gonna get our youth and it's National Webmistress Day! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 25 2021
Bad week to live in Kentucky (aren't they all?) some of us have NEVER left our pets side, ICP is hanging it up and Purdue Pete has a bad week a the office. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 24 2021
Sea World needs to get it's act together bro, being a couch potato could be deadly, the nation's tallest man has passed and the Pfizer vaccine is FDA approved! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 23 2021
Tropical Storm Henri is out here raising Hell, the FDA is begging us to quit being dumb, half of us are scared as Hell about Mondays See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 20 2021
Kids are pumped to go back to school, TO wants a comeback, most of us don't have $2K laying around and it's National Radio Day.....so here's a podcast *facepalm See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 19 2021
A roving band of teens is terrorizing Chicago, parents have a hard time entertaining kids in the Summer, none of us are watching live TV anymore, and it's National Soft Ice Cream Day, wooooo! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 18 2021
Aaron Carter is lining up his next fight, the Tigers have an unfortunate broadcast moment, Dr. Phil is taking his show on the road and Mama June is SINGLE! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 17 2021
Bad day for T-Mobile, Live Nation wants to see your papers if you wanna see a show, there is a 100 year old woman out there that could kick your ass, and parents HATE school mornings! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy[...]
August 16 2021
One yogurt a day could be great for your mind, fans are back (fighting) in the stands for the NFL, weed users may be running things now and today is a big day at the doctors for your truly! See[...]
August 13 2021
Oooooh, Friday the 13th Index! Spooky! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 12 2021
Pizza Hut is getting into the fake meat game, most of us confess our darkest secrets to the dog, Chet Hanks and Bam Margera are out there wild n' out and we're getting HARD MOUNTAIN DEW! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy[...]
August 11 2021
Cuomo is out, Margera is out of his mind, there has never been a better time to be a lazy employee and none of us trust Uncle Sam See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 10 2021
The Rock waters his muscles, our billionaires are all packing up and heading out, we'll soon only be shopping from home, and the Delta variant is fixing to ruin our Fall! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 9 2021
O.J. is nutty as Hell, we're all lying about our COVID situation, the Midwest is flooded, KFC is in the hotel business and NASA has a gig for you! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 6 2021
Disney wants your money. All your money. Spirit Airlines had a rough week, Battle Bots is sticking around and Aaron Carter is out there making that money! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 5 2021
Fells, Harvard says you need to get yours and get your often if you want to live along time, R. Kelly is getting swelly, IKEA is selling their essence and men may soon outnumber women. By a ton! See omnystudio.com/listener[...]
August 4 2021
Earth is showing some heavy wear signs, Dog the Bounty Hunter may need a part time job, 1 in 3 of us our wasting food for the likes, and this is a great week to not be named Andrew Cuomo![...]
August 2 2021
Sylvester Stallone is still kicking at 75, most of us have snacks on us at all times, BK is bringing back a classic and who is doing Fred Durst's hair? See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
August 3 2021
Gun sales are up, optimism is down, Turns out half a million bucks is what we all need to sleep at night, Apple is picking off dating sites, Pizza Hut is getting into the clothing game and Matt Damon has[...]
July 30 2021
Dude, it's already the end of July?!! WTF, I can feel Summer slipping away! Nooooo! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 29 2021
Mexico did pretty well amid the pandemic, BK is ruining your morning breath, Lays is going buck wild for Summer snacking and seniors are now stealing YOUR pills! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 28 2021
Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher put the filthy in filthy rich, Pokemon fans are getting a new show, playing adult sports is good for you in almost every way and airlines are short on gas! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 27 2021
Well, now it's a fungus that wants to kill us, nobody is buying hard seltzers now, Joe Exotic rolls out his own seltzer (lol!) Florida man is still out there and Florida-manning it up! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 26 2021
Morgan Wallen's realtor has a tough job, being poor may have a silver lining, Cheetos and Adidas are dropping a collab and we're super judgmental at the grocery store.! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 23 2021
The Olympics kicked off today, we're wildin' out on planes, Johnsonville owes us money and things work a bit differently in Alabama. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 22 2021
Coors is coming with the Summer flavors, over half of us have controversial beliefs about hot dogs, COVID is up, gas is up and Pornhub is getting sued by a museum! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 21 2021
T.J. Watt is dropping some coin, divorced people can't be friends most of the time, Taco Bell is running out of all the good stuff, and some scientists figured out exactly how many arguments we have in a week. See[...]
July 20 2021
Google is eavesdropping on us, we're getting more Cinnamon Toast Crunch treats, Britney may or may not be on drugs, and Bezos in space! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 19 2021
Turns out being bored is bad for your brain, Jeeps are heading out to sea, some of still believe there are chips in the vaccine and imagine going to Tokyo to win gold and having nowhere to properly enjoy yourself....if[...]
July 16 2021
Facebook and Twitter are having racism issues, we'll look for any excuse to skip leg day, Wikipedia says don't trust Wikipedia and Netflix is getting intot he video game business. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 15 2021
KISS are looking to take some more of your money, Vanilla Ice is slumming it these days, Popeye's is preparing for war and we have a new fittest city in America! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 14 2021
Richer Millennials are still struggling, Chipotle wants you to decode a message, it's National Nude Day and HBO Max is debuting an awful TV show...that we're totally watching! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 12 2021
Back from vacation!! High prices are here to stay, Britney Spears' lawyer isn't. Cosby making a comeback? Ladies and gentlemen...we have a new World's Deepest Pool. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
July 2 2021
We're like the two dudes who haven't challenged a Paul brother to a fight, Aldo is selling a confusing beverage, we have a new oldest man alive and PBR wants to celebrate the 4th in style! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy[...]
July 1 2021
Apple is making the biggest iPad ever, Truly is making candy now, Skittles in making yogurt, Bill Cosby is out WHAT IS HAPPENING?!! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 30 2021
Wendy's hates clean underpants, a bank makes a $50B error, Facebook is worth how much now? Also there is a new sheriff in town when it comes to weight loss. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 29 2021
Wendy's is getting spicy, Quentin Tarantino may be calling it a day soon, sex cults are almost worse than reverse mortgages and if you want your kids to eat more greens science has a solution for you! See omnystudio.com/listener for[...]
June 28 2021
Most of us feel like life got out of hand during the pandemic, rattlesnakes are taking over California, we're getting new Pringles, Portland is frying and we spend over two work weeks scrolling the internet..... See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 25 2021
Apparently most of us are looking for a booze-free vacation? Sharks are having a hot girl Summer, Twitter trolls may be legit crazy and the rich have gotten wayyyy ticher! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 24 2021
It turns out everyone got rich but us during the pandemic, wing joints are beefing on Twitter, a new variant may ruin our Summer, single people smell different and Jake Paul needs to settle down. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 23 2021
That lady with the 10 babies is a liar, if you hate porn you may also hate women, Popeye's is treating us right and bickering with your wife is not in the recipe for a long life it turns out![...]
June 22 2021
It's the last day for Prime Day, there are black market pistachios, hot people make more money than us fuggos and 25,000 wants Jeff Bezos to stay in space! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 21 2021
A woman falls in love with her alien abductor, we're low on blood, mushrooms may save your life, Father's Day is over and someone ran a 5K! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 18 2021
Friday baby! The price of a good meal is going through the roof, McDonald's has a little something for ICP fans and an infamous piece of real estate is off the market! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 17 2021
Someone bought the Manson house, we love our chocolate, the Girls Gone Wild mansion has burned down and we are a stressed workforce! Happy National Garbage Man's Day! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 16 2021
Joe Exotic found a way to make some cash in prison, it's hotter than Hell out West, Bud Light has a new way to cool down this Summer and a third of us are keeping a secret from our spouse.[...]
June 15 2021
Halfway through June already?! Kids who vape seem to be the coolest, we have no clue where landmarks are in this country, the internet wants Jeff Bezos to spend a little dough to entertain us and these times are hard[...]
June 14 2021
We can't keep our acts together on airplanes, sace travel ain't priced for the working man, cocaine is washing up on shores and a brewery in Finland is brewing some unnecessary brew! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 11 2021
It's going to be hot AF in the desert this weekend, Facebook is giving us the tracker nobody asked for, BitCoin is legal currency in one country now and for some reason all the billionaires are leaving!!!!? See omnystudio.com/listener for[...]
June 10 2021
A ton of people have gone without "it" for the last year, American Airlines is asking the dumb questions, MLB is having a bad week and a new record for most crowded uterus! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 9 2021
Nevada is about to crank the party up a notch, R. Kelly is looking for a lawyer...any lawyer will do, Kid Rock is helping life return to normal and Krispy Kreme is NOT doing their part to help this beach[...]
June 8 2021
Crypto scams are on the rise, we do so much friggin' laundry, America's most hated bug is NOT the spider and Jason tried to use an Index joke in his home life and it went about as well as you'd[...]
June 7 2021
John Rahm had a great day turn bad on the golf course, most of us don't buy "green company" lies, we're in for a huge STD spike and it was a long weekend for a couple of "Tiger King" stars[...]
June 4 2021
It's Friday! Bear Superfran joins the Index, an air conditioner is on the way, Coach K is out and half of us are with the worst we've ever had in bed! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 3 2021
Medina Spirit's drug test was a big ol' fail, Pizza Hut is bringing back another retro favorite, Miller Lite has the coolest koozie of all time, MGK is the kinf of franchin' and a sad sad saaaaaad dinosaur story See[...]
June 2 2021
Hackers are going after our true loves! The pandemic is making your kids blind, we're getting new Chex Mix and a new app will listen to you cry! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
June 1 2021
The Friends reunion was a huge hit, airlines are back off the booze because we can't behave, an actor had a rough bathroom break and apparently the NBA is just a free for all these days. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy[...]
60% of us NEED a playlist bro, Philly is going hard for a cheesesteak record, John Cena is having a rough week and your dog may be having a better than normal 4th of July! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
May 26 2021
Ray J can't stop banging them slots, Biden is getting his lift on, a glass of milk a day can save your life and I have to get a new A/C unit See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
May 25 2021
A Florida high school ratchets up the creep factor, we think we're most comfy surrounded by nature, kids can't survive 30 minutes outside without being bored and these are some lean days for Tiger King Park See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy[...]
May 24 2021
Dogs are really good at sniffing out the COVID, well done steak could kill a new relationship, Crocs has a new collab and there are smart toilets? See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
May 21 2021
BAM! It's Friday! We have new cocktail recipes coming our way, the heat is turning up, for the record I CAN afford ice cream!
May 20 2021
More stimmy may be coming, Taco Bell is rolling back out a classic, we have electric F-1Fiddies and Jason has a big night ahead of him!
May 19 2021
Kendall Jenner's tequila has arrived, a Kpop band is hanging it up, Krispy Kreme has your Summer snacking all locked down and we're literally working ourselves to death!
May 18 2021
a 95 year old woman has the secret of life, Cheez-Itz are 100 years old, an Ohio woman is packing serious heat and BK is testing out a classic that nobody is clamoring for!
May 17 2021
Mega Millionsis almost half a billion dollars, we're pretty picky when it comes to choosing a pet, Joe Exotic REALLY wants out of prison, and PBR is gonna get you lifted this Summer!
May 14 2021
We need to be told not to fill grocery bags with gas. Man. Grocery bags?! Also the RNR Hall class of '21 is announced and COVID can kill your bedroom skills!
May 13 2021
Hair bands are hitting the high seas again, most of us haven't crossed state lines in a shocking length of time, we wanna try something new and you feel younger? You should try it!
May 12 2021
Logan Paul is joining forces with the Gronkowski bros, Amazon has nothing but phony reviews, we're not getting Golden Globes and It's National Nutty Fudge Day!
May 11 2021
It's National Eat What You Want Day, we should all invest in bong makers, your pet is going to cost you and Krispy Kreme is giving out graduation gifts!!
May 10 2021
We lost an 80s icon over the weekend, our allergies will be worse next year and forever, we're getting Lays Summer flavors and the show turns 11 today!
May 7 2021
Twitter has had about enough of your attitude sir, Steven Seagal gives pretty questionable gifts, Peloton wants it's treadmills back, and it's Mother's Day weekend!
May 6 2021
A reality star is getting her own cryptocurrency, COVID is down in LA but something else way worse is up, the Bears may be looking for new digs and it's National Nurses Day!
May 5 2020
It's Cinco de Mayo!!!!
May 4 2021
May the 4th be with you!
May 3 2021
The Draft is over, Mitt Romney had a rough weekend, we had an upset at the Kentucky Derby, the SpaceX crew are home and Mom only wants one thing for Mother's Day!
April 30 2021
RV rentals are WAY up, we have new Goldfish Crackers, we're losing our nudes, Post Malone is doing nerdy stuff and it's Derby time!
April 29 2021
Cousin Eddie wants to get into politics, new kick ass mosquitoes have been dumped on the Florida Keys, no Burning Man for 2021 and it's NFL Draft Day babaaaaaaay!!!
April 28 2021
Ted Nugent thinks his haters are all Satanic, Britney Spears' Mom is lookin noice these day, we all have "that one" friend and the census results are in and this place is too damned crowded!!
April 27 2021
Elon Musk thinks we're gonna kill a ton of people to get to Mars, we don't do crowds anymore but we are going on Summer vacation!
April 26 2021
Jorge Masvidal had a rough weekend, Lions aren't looking for turds, Guinness has a new brew and someone hung some drywall over the weekend like a grown up!
April 23 2021
Things are not going well in Philly, a group of people are bolting from Instagram, COVID is getting nuts again in Michigan and we learn about the absolute worst prank show in history!
April 22 2021
Grand opening? Grand Closing for the Super Soccer guys, Sour Patch Kids has a new flavor, Netflix just burns more and more money and it's Earth Day!
April 21 2021
McDonald's has a new meal on the way, New Zealand says no to smoking, Morrissey is upset, Batman is old now and Taco Bell wants those old sauce packets back!
April 20 2021
IT'S 420 Y'ALL! Hopefully you've indulged enough to find the Kluck Index funny!!
April 19 2021
Amazon wants out of the RPG business, Oregon wants masks forever, you can buy statues from the creepiest place on Earth and Joe Buck finds new ways to upset Twitter.
April 16 2021
The MyPillow Guy wants his own social media network, Sweden is running out of "seed" Jay Cutler has a mean dog and there are some racists quitting Scrabble!
April 15 2021
Bernie Madoff didn't quite get what he deserved, we don't need the gym anymore, plastic bags may be going away and STDs are at an all time high! For the 6th straight year!!
April 14 2021
Uber may be giving you a lift in a different way, the CDC wants Michigan to close up shop, there is vegan SPAM now and a Patriot retires.
April 13 2021
We're getting a "Magic Mike" TV show, none of us are emotionally ready to retire, Michigan is not doing well keeping this COIV thing under control and none of us can remember our passwords!
April 2 2021
Pizza Hut is making some changes, walking is good for that brain of yours, it's not Good Friday after all and we almost got cocaine burritos!
April 1 2021
Nearly half of us are losing out ability to make small talk, we're losing out ability to procreate, getting more positive about the vaccine and a classic breakfast cereal celebrates a half century!
March 31 2021
Being playful may help things at home, appreciate the manatee, roller skating is biggity back y'all! It's the last day of March let's gooooo!
March 30 2021
We're getting new "Ally McBeal" for some reason, we're not sleeping much these days, something is killing young bears in SoCal and we cannot get enough TV.
March 29 2021
Joe Exotic is not single, we're getting like, no sleep, the Gorilla Glue Girl is preggers and we're getting new Pop Tarts!
March 26 2021
Our junk is literally shrinking our junk! You may be exercising yourself to an early grave, Pepsi has an AWFUL idea for soda and the pandemic has killed our retirement dreams!
March 25 2021
Biden's dawgs are back, things aren't going well for Ellen, Slim Jims could we wiping out your mind, Rams are being recalled and the Lions are just mean!
March 24 2021
Autographed rapper cards are apparently a lucrative business, Florida is a dangerous hell hole, Lake Michigan is heating up and Krispy Kreme wants to treat you for getting the vaccine.
March 23 2021
Oral Roberts babay!!! Kids can get closer in school, Tokyo doesn't want us this Summer, there is NO X-rated Mrs. Doubtfire and sex parties are returning!
March 22 2021
Sean Hannity is a proud member of Vape Nayyyysh, LeBron is getting some time off, Mama June is getting clean and Joe Exotic says his life was better before the Netflix show.
March 19 2021
The NCAA tournament kicks off today, most of us don't know what to do if we're dehydrated, we're getting a gay Captain America and there are some real winners outside Britney Spears' courtroom!
March 18 2021
Are you a slow walker? Have fun with your early death. Connor McGregor has had a pretty profitable week, Sharon Osbourne is talking herself out of a job and Google is listening to you sleep. Creep!
March 17 2021
HAPPY ST. PATTY'S DAY!
March 16 2021
We learn the biggest of fun facts, what Indiana is blowing it's COVID money on, why our smartphones are ruining our lives and the Deftones are getting their own booze!
March 15 2021
March Madness brackets are set, an Oklahoma basketball announcer is looking for a new job, we're watching more filth than ever before and it's National Napping Day!
March 12 2021
Sonic wanst you to start tipping, Matthew McConaughey wants to get into politics, Panda Express has weird team building exercises, and PBR is gonna get you drunk this summer!
March 11 2021
That buffalo dude from the Capitol riots ain't getting out of jail, Kia has an embarrassing recall, food hangovers are a thing and it's Johnny Appleseed Day!
March 10 2021
Today is the day we found out the van has been paid off!!!
March 9 2021
Phil Mickelson is having a rough stretch, a high school teacher wins the lottery, a happy healthy relationship has more advantages than the happy and healthy part and it's National Crab Meat Day?!?
March 8 2021
There is a pen that draws edible candy, the first Tweet ever is for sale, a large percentage of parents are embarrassed to be seen playing with their kids and it's finally warm out!!!!!
March 5 2021
Indiana expanded vaccination this week, the Great Apes are making enemies at the zoo, Sonic wants to get you drunk and China wants a moment of your time if you come visit.
March 4 2021
Taco Bell is testing a new attack on your insides, Snooki has unretired, Will Smith wants to run for office and it's National Pound Cake Day!
March 3 2021
A man's cockfighting career is cut short, we're getting a space hotel, naked peanut butter cups, live concerts and Michigan is getting 2 more hours of drinking time!
March 2 2021
We find out what the World's Most Stolen Food is, Michigan is getting a new QB, we have a new COVID vaccine option and maaaaaaan does it pay to run Google.
March 1 2021
The Illinois Tollway is too good for old fashioned cash, Florida man has a bad day at KFC, and Virginia legalized the Devil's Lettuce! Also...we made it into March yo!
February 26 2021
Tom Brady is just going to play until he dies of old age, Cheez-It hates pant legs, we're talking to our significant other on the toilet too much and it's the final Index of February yooooooooo!
February 25 2021
Blink 182's drummer is making us feel old, Frogger is getting the game show treatment, it's National Toast Day and we're getting new bizarre looking mail trucks!
February 24 2021
One third of us have cars filled with junk, Xzibit is losing half his stuff, the perfect age is 36 and we're getting a new menu item at the Bell, Always cause for a celebration!
February 23 2021
We have a new drunk driving champion (?) good news if you wear glasses, we are appreciating the little things and we talk Trick Daddy, Bobby Shmurda and Harry Potter!
February 22 2021
The NHL had a hard time with ice this weekend, having a cat can ruin your online dating chances, more men these days are infertile, Kim and Kanye are hanging it up and Kellogg's has found a way to get[...]
February 19 2021
Over half of us kiss our dogs more than our partners, Ted Cruz is taking heat on social media, caffeine (is delicious) and also changes your brain structure and we have a new ice cream topping!!!
February 18 2021
Some of us are not getting outdoors amid the pandemic. At all. Not like even to get the mail! Bill Gates has issues with our meat, Rihanna is worth a billion in her underpants, and a special one day only[...]
February 17 2021
A Kardashian liquor (licker lol) is headed our way! Things are going poorly in Texas, Iced Earth members are quitting and it's Ash Wednesday!
February 16 2021
We find out COVID made many of us consider a career change AND it may be hanging around for a while. A man leaves $5M to his dog and it's Fat Tuesday babayyyy!
February 15 2021
It turns out most of us have impossible financial goals, COVID is causing a surge in romance scams, the health experts want us outside for 2 hours a day and it's Presidents Day...let the deep discounts rain down upon us!
February 12 2021
Gina Carano is spending the weekend looking for work, NASCAR is back this weekend, Larry Flynt has passed and it's Valentine's weekend!
February 11 2021
The Dallas Mavericks are causing a stir, the average gamer is NOT who you think it is and McDonald's has answered our hungover prayers!!!!
February 10 2021
We get a look at the "new" Suicide Squad Joker, lose an Alaskan Bush Person AND a Supreme, Bow Wow is hanging up his microphone and we poorly received Tim Conway joke.
February 9 2021
Boozing is on the rise, It's National Cut The Cord Day, we take a lengthy look at a recent trip to White Castle and most of us want to die at home.
February 8 2021
Gorilla Glue is NOT for hair styling, none of us have plans for Valentine's Day, Aaron Rodgers got engaged and White Castle puts a body in some kind of a way.
February 5 2021
Parler's CEO is probably updating his LinkedIn, Chipotle outranks every other restaurant in one category, Little Debbie and A-Rod make appearances and it's Superbowl time!!!!
February 4 2021
Lamar Odom and Aaron Carter are going to "celebrity" box, Jeff Bezos is stepping down from his 9-5, we are supposed to avoid Superbowl parties and woof, Morgan Wallen.
February 3 2021
Taco Bell is customizing your Cravings, UberEats wants more of your dollars, EA Sports is bringing back College Football and it's the day the music died!
February 2 2021
Turns out, a pandemic has a DRASTIC effect on the murder rates here, Brady wants to play forever, Megan Fox has awful taste in music and it's Groundhog Day
February 1 2021
The Lions unloaded Stafford, it's the first day of a brand new month, uh GameStop is in the news and a fresh pickup line guaranteed not to work. Ever.
January 29 2021
We're getting Valentine's mac n' cheese, flying pizzas, electric Chevys and maybe fake tuna? Lots happening for the last Index of January!
January 28 2021
The shark population is down, Jake Paul has found his next opponent, Pizza Hut is cooking us a new pie and it turns out we're fatter than actual elephants.
January 27 2021
A third of us claim we can make dinner in 10 mins or less (BS) we're getting supercharged Coke, Bob Evans has rubber in it and a ton of us are walking around with an STD!
January 26 2021
Cats and dogs are trying to line jump for the vaccine, GameStop had a wild Monday, there is something faster than 5G and Floyd Mayweather deals Conor McGregor his second knockout blow in a week!
January 25 2021
It turns out "fat but fit" is a myth, the MyPillow guy wants to run for office, the Lions and Matthew Stafford are breaking up and we lost Larry King.
January 22 2021
One gift is more cliché for Valentine's Day than the rest, Connor McGregor fights this weekend, and someone is winning nearly a billion dollars tonight!!!!
January 21 2021
It's the 21st day of the 21st year of the 21st century. SO this Index is probably cursed! CURRRRRRRSED!
January 20 2021
Most of us have watched more movies in the last year than any other year of our lives, a sad day for Joe Exotic, MyPillow guy's days are numbered and it's Inauguration Day!
January 19 2021
Girl, Chipotle has the cure for your hunger AND your thirst, one state is more stressed than any of us, we're getting new Hidden Valley Ranch and they got the Iced Earth guy!
January 18 2021
People are literally dying to see Bow Wow in concert (WTF?) our eating habits are terrible and getting worse, Klondike is NOT helping the matter and our robot overlords had a birthday over the weekend!
January 15 2021
Taco Bell is bringing back an alleged fan favorite, Mark Zuckerberg knows your cycle ladies, some dude in Indy bought the World's most expensive baseball card and between Powerball and Mega Millions someone is winning over a billion dollars this[...]
January 14 2021
Bruce Willis apologises for his lack of mask, women say the pandemic is aging them at light speed, the Bears are screwed at QB and Lamar Odom got himself a job! Plus a long-dormant ice cream treat is returning from[...]
January 13 2021
Cheetos has more orange to get all over our jeans, we're getting a flying Caddy, live music may be making a comeback and apparently non of us like the way we look on Zoom.
January 12 2021
Tonight's MegaMillions is thiccc, those Pokémon cards we tossed in the early 2000s are worth a sickening amount of money, Ben & Jerry's is making doggo treats and there is a job opening with the Eagles!
January 11 2021
KFC has a launch date for their new spiffy chicken sandwich, this is a bad week if you own Parler, Bud Light Seltzer has more flavors coming and this is the most wanted Iced Earth has ever been.
January 8 2021
After a rough 2020, half of us are thinking about country livin', we have a new World's Richest Person, new Klondike treats and IT'S JASON LEE'S BIRTHDAY!!!
January 7 2020
McDonald's is blessing us with new chickie bois, a "Deadliest Catch" star dies chasin crab, Kim and Kanye are ending it and so is Family Video!
January 6 2020
Amazon is about to dominate the skies, dating apps make for BETTER relationships, rough 24 hours for the Cleveland Browns, Tanya Roberts has finally (we think) passed away and time is literally speeding up!
January 5 2021
COVID is hurting cocaine sales, a Tiger King star is in trouble (again) Indiana gets all of March Madness and pour one out for Farmville y'all!
December 18 2020
BOOM! Here it is, the final Index of 2020!!
December 17 2020
It's National Maple Syrup Day, a Detroit Lion got a gruesome injury, you can't say "simp" anymore and the most embarrassing thing we've Goggled all year.
December 16 2020
Most of us are concerned about what are parents eat, Batman is using the F-word in 2021, we're getting new pigs, no Superbowl ads and you can get a GOAT license plate in Florida!
December 15 2020
The makers of "Cyberpunk" are having a bad week, COVID may be joining you for Christmas this year, the Indians are donezo, Oreo is releasing the final boss cookie and it's National Cat Herders Day!
December 14 2020
Popeyes is fattening us up for the holidays, the MyPillow guy is out there, crazy as ever, water drinkers are winners and somehow the Bears looked like an actual team yesterday!
December 11 2020
Underground sex parties are a thing and on the rise, we have a new adult app, official colors of 2020 and our collective mental health has reached a new low
December 10 2020
DoorDash is now worth a whole pile of money, Dr. Octopus is back, Johnny Depp's bad 2020 rolls on and Post Malone is giving back to his old high school!
December 9 2020
We have different wants for Christmas this year, Kellogg's is making stoners days, after 20 years a 90s cereal is back and things are not going swell for the Wolverines!
December 8 2020
Tom Brady got a surprise man on his couch, Bob Dylan cashed a massive check yesterday, Pizza Hut is trying to kill me this holiday season and breakdancing is officially an Olympic Sport!
December 7 2020
Another big name has the dreaded COVID, Chipotle is testing a fancy new menu item, we're spending less on Christmas and it's National Illinois Day!?
December 4 2020
So here is the deal...the recorder didn't work today so I went into the studio after the show and redid the entire Index. For you. Because I love you that much!
December 3 2020
Ex-Lions coach Matt Patricia may have a burner Twitter account, Post Malone is spending big dollars on a garbage team, and NASA has identified that giant asteroid from Tuesday!
December 2 2020
We're sitting more than ever before, almost all of us are in desperate need of cheering up, Colombia may legalize blow and hey THE McRIB IS BACK
December 1 2020
Bears' coach Matt Nagy is probably going to looking for work soon, it's the National Day of Giving, Seacrest is cashing out and it's AC/DCember!
November 30 2020
Back off vacation! So much happens in a week! Christmas came early for Lions fans, Aaron Carter has himself a holiday job and enough with the Cyber Monday emails already!
November 19 2020
Well, your Roomba may have been hacked, Hidden Valley wants to sell you a lifetime of Ranch, Joe Exotic thinks he'll be home for Christmas and it's the Great American Smokeout!
November 18 2020
Beyond Meat is getting juicier, we only have one white giraffe left and he is leading a boring life, Philly is cracking down on ALL indoor gatherings and Elon Musk makes $170K A SECOND!
November 17 2020
Oh man we may have a vaccine soon! The Jets continue on their path of frivolity, video games can sub for a therapist and we're getting Gluten-free Oreos!
November 16 2020
Pringles is bringing the heat, we're down one nudist bed and breakfast, Ritz is selling plates you can eat and Mt. Dew is turning 80!
November 13 2020
It's Friday the 13th, the PS5 is out, Phil Collins said he isn't smelly and we spend a ton of time worrying about money!
November 12 2020
Sam's Club is going to help you countdown to Christmas, Buzzfeed is getting into the sex toy game, it's National French Di[ Day and according a court in Germany, techno IS music after all.
November 11 2020
McDonalds is rolling out a plant-based menu, multivitamins turns out are full of crap, the CDC wants us to eat outdoors and Happy Veterans Day!
November 10 2020
We're about to have a full on senior citizen boxing division, there is one toy left out of the Hall of Fame Again, you can dive down and tour the Titanic and apparently we all have a "financial awakening" around[...]
November 9 2020
Pickle Rick is getting his own drink, we lost a ton of sleep last week, Guinness is mounting an attack on your holiday liver and it's National SCRAPPLE DAY!
November 5 2020
Cardi B smokes three at a time, it's National Men Make Dinner Day and man these "Tiger King" folks just won't go away
November 4 2020
It's National Stress Awareness Day, Russell Wilson spends a million dollars a year on his bod and things are not going well for the Wisconsin Badgers
November 3 2020
OMG it's finally Election Day! Sorry I missed yesterday's Index, forgot to hit "save" lol!
October 30 2020
More countries are going for a second helping of lockdown, White Sox wanted a new REALLY OLD manager, it's Devil's Night and Halloween y'all!
October 28 2020
Well, we have more Murder Hornet news, Buzzfeed isn't doing so hot, most of us miss going into the office and over half of us are spending too much on Halloween!
October 27 2020
GrubHub wants you to vote.....and eat next Tuesday, we're getting more "Hocus Pocus" NASA is taking us back to the moon, and Winter time beauty tips!
October 26 2020
It's National Pumpkin Day, AB has himself a jay oh bee, Mike Tyson is out there making music and we find out why Jason Lee insists on wearing sunglasses in the gym.
October 23 2020
Borat 2 is out today, the Royal family eats KFC, Blaze Pizza is going to hurt your fanny and the Big 10 is back!!
October 22 2020
Matthew McConaughey is NOT the most shirtless actor, Kim K turns 40, we're getting an electric H2 and it's the final debate, can you believe it?!
October 21 2020
The Fitzmagic is over in Miami, one of those Whitmer kidnappers has made bail, we don't know how to recycle and we're getting a COVID breathalyzer!
October 20 2020
Kids are better at tech than their parents, the World Series begins today, we're getting 4G on the moon, a car that goes over 316mph and it's my wife's bday!
October 19 2020
A weird beachy activity is way up during the pandemic, Jack In The Box is giving away something very unsexy, women be walkin, women be walkin! And it turns out the Michigan Whitmer kidnappers drove.....a PT Cruiser.
October 16 2020
It's Global Cat Day, let the celebraish begin! Tommy Lee has a bold take, Dunkin wants to blow you up for Halloween and the DEA set a new meth record (sorry Florida!)
October 15 2020
Well, Prime Day 2020 is behind us, parents all wish they had super powers, the CDC is crapping all over Turkey Day and CraigsList wants to lend you a hand...
October 14 2020
AMC might not be around for a while longer, a soccer stud catches COVID, there is an elite sex club we'll never get into and it's National Be Bald and Free Day!
October 13 2020
Most of us are ignoring our health in these trying times (duh), it's National No Bra Day and we're celebrating, we're getting a new iPhone and we're going to be paying off this pandemic for a long, long time.
October 12 2020
Like your Uncle Steve, COVID is very high right now, PBR is getting into the weed game, Cardi B has her own shoes and some lunatics tried to capture a governor!
October 9 2020
The Lions are on a bye week and will still find a way to lose, 50 of us are worth more than 165M, McDonalds is beefing up it's breakfast menu and we only feel safe at home!
October 8 2020
There is a bit of audio troubles for the first 10 seconds 9f today's index....sorry!
October 7 2020
Detroit Lions head coach has no idea what work is apparently, a viral Karen goes to jail, 3 in 10 of us plan on taking family temps over the holidays and Joey Chestnut is the KING baby!
October 6 2020
We found out what decade we're going to be our happiest (uh, we have a while) we're getting a Jeffrey Dahmer show, the NFC East is a trainwreck and we have a very special Halloween coming up!
October 5 2020
Cam Newton got the COVID, Nikki Sixx has a baller crib for sale, and it's National Apple Betty Day!
October 2 2020
Florida is open for business, Home Depot wants that Halloween money, the airlines need more money (LOL) and Subway got classified as cake this week in Ireland!!
October 1 2020
Some of us won't be getting flu shots apparently, it's a touchy holiday for one half of the show, and it's finally Rocktober y'all!
September 30 2020
Well the debates were a dumpster fire, we are not getting more stimulus, and it's the last day of Led Zeptember!!!!
September 29 2020
It's Presidential Debate night, Mitch Trubisky is benched for good, Carl's Jr. is beefing up their menu and the pandemic continues to wreak havoc on our finances.
September 28 2020
It's National Drink Beer Day, the Bears have finally done the right thing and brain eating microbes in our water would be a fitting finale to 2020.
September 25 2020
Most cat owners feel their kitties give them something special. Me? Not so much. California is outlawing new gasoline cars, New Jersey is outlawing paper bags, Ring doorbell get's SUPER high tech and it's Stryker Liker Day!
September 24 2020
U of M games are going to hit different in Ann Arbor, Sizzler isn't sizzling anymore, Reese's wants our money and we're getting new emojis!
September 23 2020
Lego wants your money in a month, all of it! It pays to marry Larry King, MJ is racin and the CDC is trying to cancel trick or treating!
September 22 2020
The Federal debt is so high it almost sounds made up, the Emmys ain't dojn' so hot these days, a Tinder date goes horribly wrong and Kit Kat has a club you can join!
September 21 2020
It's not even out yet and Sony is already apologizing for the PS5, the Rock is really, REALLY strong, Trader Joe's has a new brew headed our way and it looks like Walmart is buying TikTok
September 18 2020
You can buy McRib shorts now? Alexa is going to start searing at you even more now, we all have our minds made up about November and we talk affordable hip hop memorabilia
September 17 2020
We have a very unhappy Bear, Fox News is making cuts, Kanye West is having a baaaaaaaad week and the Big Ten is back babaaaayy!
September 16 2020
We're getting a new Twinkies filling, Cinnabon is getting us up in the morning, STDs spikes are being blamed on one guy and Taco Bell is getting into the wine game
September 15 2020
We're getting a new Pepsi drink, U of M may not avoid a big L at OSU, bears are getting serious about this whole preventing wildfires thing and hey, Anthony Weiner found a job!!
September 14 2020
One game into 2020 and the Lions haven't missed a beat, there is a new member of the Avengers, you can get a $1000 face sheild and it's....National Sober Day!
September 11 2020
Arby's is selling just bags of meat, Chuck Norris does NOT need ED meds, Paris Hilton wants to be a Mom and FOOTBALL IS BACK BABY!
September 10 2020
Joe Exotic's new underpants are selling like hot cakes, most of us know we're going to be working stiffs during retirement, we learn a gross new cocktail and it's football time!!!
September 9 2020
So it turns out we all planted those seeds from China, a new #1 name for girls, a new cheaper X-Box is headed our way and it's National Wiener Schnitzel Day (how's your mother?)
September 8 2020
Back at it after a long Labor Day weekend! We're having trouble focusing, not drinking enough water, basically having a rough go of it these days....lol
September 4 2020
Taco Bell is hanging a beloved menu item's jersey from the rafters, STDs in England are probably better than they are here, we find out a new nickname for the Jeep Wrangler and it's time for a 3 day weekend!
September 3 2020
David Blaine out there doing balloon stunts?! What year is it, lol!!
September 2 2020
A shocking number of us still don't believe in vaccines, Joe Exotic has new underpants for sale, Rolls Royce unveiled a $332K car and junk food may be aging you swiftly. And deliciously.
September 1 2020
Who is excited for what September brings? Nobody. Dunkin wants to get you drunk, this civil unrest may last a lot longer than we think, Amazon drones are taking flight and we have flying cars!
August 31 2020
Aaaaand just like that, August is over! It's Nat'l Trail Mix Day, there are Josh Groban superfans? Napping is sweet but it may kill you and just when 202 can't get worse, it does.
August 28 2020
R. Kelly had a bad day in prison, Polish elephants are on the CBD, Amazon WANTS TO KNOW YOUR LOCATION. And steps. And mood.
August 27 2020
Did you know there is a $300 toaster out there? Little Caesars has a new pie, porn isn't bad for your relationship it turns out and man, Hurricane Laura is getting bigger!
August 26 2020
We spend SO MUCH MONEY on toilet paper in our lives! Elon Musk wants to chip our brains, positive drug tests are at an all time high and McDonald's is bringing the heat!
August 25 2020
COVID is now messing with our nudist colonies! KFC is hanging up their slogan for a bit, the Dolphins want their 10 fans in the stands and we find out what the most iconic fashion item of all time is!
August 24 2020
It's National Waffle Day, O.J. is out there still getting the ladies, the Gulf Coast and your Mom have something in common and NASA gives us a real "November Surprise." Happy Monday y'all!
August 21 2020
Good news, we may be close to a hangover cure! AirBNB says no more parties, The Stones are opening up a store and a HUGE mistake is about to be made in Florida.
August 20 2020
Man, the givernment is being a real killjoy with the new booze consumption guidelines, Jeff Lowe done gone and lost his zoo license, and the Indiana lotto has fallen on hard times...
August 19 2020
Tokyo is getting some wild toilets, times are even hard for the Tooth Fairy and it turns out recycling may get you laid!
August 18 2020
As it turns out hand sanitizer and matches do not mix, bears are freaking out up North, Death Valley is just a ball of fire now and there is a much darker side of monkey ownership than we thought.
August 17 2020
Joe Exotic just won't accept his 15 minutes are up, our National debt is getting almost fake sounding, we have a new Oreo flavor coming and it's a day very near and dear to the show!
August 14 2020
Jake Paul doing trashy stuff, video games are turning out to be GOOD for kids, David Blaine is back and we celebrate National Creamsicle Day!
August 13 2020
We're getting new streaming services, the ladies in our lives have ZERO interest in quarantining with us again, we celebrate National Left Handers Day and a new tasty holiday treat is headed our way!
August 12 2020
Things are not going well for the Washington Football Team, Patrick from SpongeBob is breaking off on his own, Chipotle has an odd collab and a big day for the tallest of tall vans!
August 11 2020
Turns out one thing is making almost all of us miss out on morning smooches, Amazon wants to move into your mall and lamp oil gets it's very first mention!
August 10 2020
It's National Shape wear Day, Halloween may be saved after all, Taco Bell is testing the wing waters and I have a big day at the bank planned!
August 5 2020
Well, ordering BK is now a contact sport, we are not a satisfied people, bears are getting smoked by cars out West and it's National Underwear Day!
August 4 2020
Well, someone actually found a murder hornet, 80% of parents are on the same page for school thisFall, Singapore really enforces their quarantine and The Rock blew some big coin over the weekend!
August 3 2020
Another week, another COVID nightmare lol. The Cardinals are trying to take the Marlines Coronavius ranking, we may lose TikTok and we did lose Wilford Brimley!
July 30 2020
Apple is ripping off their idea for new AirPods, Totino's is making an unholy alliance, French's mustard needs to stay in it's lane and so does Dunkin' Donuts!
July 29 2020
Oh man, players are opting out of the 2020 NFL season but not the right players! We have a new secret to long life, Marlins still out there ruining everything for baseball and if you gets seeds in the mail...DON'T[...]
July 28 2020
More of us want to travel than ever before, Apple wants to be in your face literally, a shark is tearing up the East COast and Walmart is cracking down on (sigh) Nazi face masks.
July 27 2020
KFC is teaming up with Crocs for some very unsexy footwear, many of us feel Summer loses it's luster as we get older and SOME OF US ARE STILL NOT WASHING OUR HANDS
July 24 2020
A precious metal is hitting an all time high, today is a risky day if you're heading to Kentucky, we throw away a staggering amount of fruit every year and hey Indiana it's Mask Up Monday next week!
July 23 2020
These "National Such And Such" days are really getting out of control, Prego is giving us something nobody asked for and it's Opening Day BABAYYYY
July 22 2020
This is NOT the Best Week Ever for Kanye West, screen time for those children is through the roof, and Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos are having some fun times these days.
July 21 2020
Hey Warren, this is where you want to load up the description of the episode. Don't forget LOL
July 20 2020
Well, we may not see big concerts until 2022, LeBron James basketball card is worth a helluva lot, the Raiders are trying a Lions strategy and a new sex doll record sale!
July 17 2020
Yo! The Golden Girls house is up for sale!!! More stores are requiring masks (this should go well) we're running out of coins and it's National Lottery Day! SEND IT
July 16 2020
Mike Tyson is taking on a shark, your A/C might kill youBK is worried about cow farts...bro, 2020 is LIT
July 15 2020
So things are going bad in California, smart phones aren't bad for kids it turns out, Kessler is out ahead of Johnny Walker and none of us can remember our passwords. Spoiler: IT'S USUALLY PASSWORD
July 14 2020
Johnny Depp hires the worst accountants, an NBA star gets the COVID, half of us are going broke and we're also more tired than we've ever been.
July 13 2020
Oh man, a Hoosier made the front page of TMZ, a Miami zookeeper has some HUGE ones, Elon Musk had a great weekend, Tucker Carlson did not.