The Kluck Index

Cousin Eddie wants to get into politics, new kick ass mosquitoes have been dumped on the Florida Keys, no Burning Man for 2021 and it's NFL Draft Day babaaaaaaay!!!

Ted Nugent thinks his haters are all Satanic, Britney Spears' Mom is lookin noice these day, we all have "that one" friend and the census results are in and this place is too damned crowded!!

Elon Musk thinks we're gonna kill a ton of people to get to Mars, we don't do crowds anymore but we are going on Summer vacation!

Jorge Masvidal had a rough weekend, Lions aren't looking for turds, Guinness has a new brew and someone hung some drywall over the weekend like a grown up!

Things are not going well in Philly, a group of people are bolting from Instagram, COVID is getting nuts again in Michigan and we learn about the absolute worst prank show in history!

Grand opening? Grand Closing for the Super Soccer guys, Sour Patch Kids has a new flavor, Netflix just burns more and more money and it's Earth Day!

McDonald's has a new meal on the way, New Zealand says no to smoking, Morrissey is upset, Batman is old now and Taco Bell wants those old sauce packets back!

IT'S 420 Y'ALL! Hopefully you've indulged enough to find the Kluck Index funny!!

Amazon wants out of the RPG business, Oregon wants masks forever, you can buy statues from the creepiest place on Earth and Joe Buck finds new ways to upset Twitter.

The MyPillow Guy wants his own social media network, Sweden is running out of "seed" Jay Cutler has a mean dog and there are some racists quitting Scrabble!